Miles On My Heart

It slips through my fingers like sand. I can’t seem to hold it long enough. I get a handful and then it’s gone. Gone like a minnow fleeing any slight movement in the water. 

A feeling so strong but so delicate. It’s a feeling I didn’t expect to have, it came by surprise. Desire overwhelms me and I can’t help but wonder where this will go. One day I have hope, the next day I am hopeless. I’m never sure. Unsure of everything. I hold back when really I want to pour out all I have. Fill the cup to the brim. It shouldn’t be so hard, but my determination comes easy. Chasing a feeling, chasing a place that I know could be so good. 

My trust is wavering. Inconsistencies give me self-doubt. I have been unloved before and my tender heart can’t help but feel unworthy. There are so many things I want to say, but I second guess every word. I blame myself when things go silent. 

I should probably give up. Walk away and keep searching for what I need, because I am worth more than waiting for when it’s convenient. My energy should be sacred. But instead, I do everything I’m not supposed to do.

Deep down my heart knows love exists and I know my heart will be loved again some day. It’s a heart worth loving. In due time. Paying my dues and practicing patience. Giving up is easy, but I prefer the hard road. I can only quit when I know I’ve given all I’ve got and there is nothing left.

Time is a funny thing and it passes by like a cool ocean breeze. Each day is a new chance to feel that breeze and pray for sunshine and fulfillment. It doesn’t always come, but I know that it exists. But how much time needs to pass to get to the place I want to be? How much longer do I need to keep going? How many miles will I put on my heart? My tank is nearly on empty. Frustration grows more and more as time goes by, and I do my best to not let it fester. But I’m weak sometimes. And sometimes I cry. 

I can’t always hold it together. Sometimes I get angry. Mostly it’s sadness that consumes me. My feelings are overwhelming and I know things could be so good if I just had the chance I need to prove it. I could be the missing puzzle piece but this puzzle doesn’t want to be finished. I know who I am and what I have to offer. I am comfortable in my own company. I need more than myself. I need tender touches and soft kisses. I need passionate conversation and magic moments. I crave connection. I want excitement.

Maybe one day I’ll breakthrough the wall that is built so strongly. Maybe one day the puzzle will be complete. Maybe one day my efforts will be worth it and my patience will pay off. Until then, I’ll keep faith that what is meant to be will be because in the end, faith is all there is.

I’m practicing patience. But my patience is wearing thin.

LIFE: How to deal with a full plate of it

SO much to do, never enough time to do it all! Ah!

No. Truth is, we always make time for the things we want to. But it can become overwhelming when so many people or responsibilities are trying to take a piece of you all at once.

I work full-time, go to school part-time, and I have family, friends and a boyfriend of almost 3 years who all mean the world to me and whom I love to hang out with - and I feel like although I don't always balance it all, I do a good job at keeping my sanity.

So, of course I decided to put together a list of things that have helped me manage it all to the best of my ability:

1. Meditation or yoga, or both
Yes, it's kind of cliché, but it works. I'm no guru, but I can tell you one thing - there's nothing like taking a little time to focus on your mind, to take a moment to collect your thoughts, and to work at easing any craziness that may be going on up there. I like to meditate on my way home from work while sitting in traffic. I just breathe and take time to not think about my problems or to-do list.

Yoga is new to me, and I'm loving it. I just YouTube some beginner's yoga videos and choose ones specifically about relaxing or stress relief, like this beginners series from PsycheTruth. I display it on my TV, and bam - instant yoga. It's done wonders for my anxiety and stress, like seriously. It doesn't even need to be a long session; 20-30 minutes is what I do, but even a quick 10-15 minute session helps.

2. Plan ahead and keep a schedule
"Fail to plan, and you plan to fail." More clichéness, but so very true. So, at the start of my school semester, I always write down every single assignment, test or paper that I'll be doing throughout the term. I make a schedule of the days I'll be doing work for each class.

I also strategically plan out my family time, boyfriend time, and friend time. I basically make my plans at least 2 or more weeks in advance. Sometimes I even book an entire month of plans in advance. I always schedule time to do homework or write a paper down to the very minute I will work on it, and then around that I'll decide what days I will spend with my family, what days I'll spend with my boyfriend, and what days I'll have my girls' night. I also make sure to schedule some time for myself in which I like to catch up on TV shows (like Once Upon a Time and New Girl).

3. Prioritize and learn how to say NO!
This is maybe the most important part. Sometimes, you may feel like everyone is tugging at you from all directions. That can be so stressful, and that's when you need to take a step back and prioritize the situation. Decide what or who is most important at the time, what needs your attention most, and what or who can wait.

After prioritizing, you need to get the hang of saying 'no' when you need to. You can't please everyone all the time, and you can't have time to do everything at once. It's OKAY to say no to that dinner party with the girls, or to tell your boyfriend you won't be able to see him that day because you have a paper due. If they love you, they will understand. Anyone who doesn't respect your schedule and time, can go fly a kite. Real people will always be around, even if they have to wait, and will always be supportive of you.



I really hope some of these tips will help you if you ever feel overwhelmed as I often have. It's an on-going process for me, and I work every single day towards controlling my stress and managing my time effectively, so I can enjoy everyone and everything in my life.


Do you have any life management tips that have helped you? Please share! I'm always looking for new methods of managing my madness.



<3, VA

5 signs your job is like a bad romantic relationship

When it comes to being in a relationship, it's important that you love or like the person for real, otherwise you'll have to put in work on a daily basis to keep your sanity. If you really love/like the person and enjoy their company, then it's a piece of cake because it's something that you enjoy to do and will come naturally, and will also fill you with joy and happiness and blah blah blah.

The same goes for your job. When you enjoy doing something (or someone, hehe), then it's not going to be "work" for you. I define "work" as being something that requires a lot of time, energy and causes a lot of stress, but does not make you happy. The only thing about a bad job that makes you happy is being done for the day; the only thing about a bad relationship that makes you happy is also being done for the day. It's basically just a routine, and you stick with it because you're comfortable. Like those great health benefits they offer, or sex benefits, whatever. Well actually, if the sex is really, really good then it may be worth sticking around.

On the other hand, when your passion becomes your job, you really won't have to work a day in your life, because you will be happy to do what you do. You'll look forward to doing it every single day, because that's love, baby. Sure, there will still be challenges and hard times, but when you love what or who you do, then it's worth it and you're HAPPY to go through it all.

I feel like a lot of people in bad relationships, whether it be romantic or professional, may not even realize they are in one. So, I put together a few warning signs that maybe you're dating a bad job:

1. You're expected to be psychic, all of the time.
Your boss expects you to always know what they expect of you, but they fail to give you any clear direction whatsoever. There is a huge difference between taking initiative and being proactive, and being psychic. If you want to be proactive, you need to at least have SOME sort of idea of what is needed.

2. You're job is clingy. SO clingy
You work hourly, but are expected to stay late and come in early, anything to get the job done, despite the fact that you're not a salary employee and so it will cost them overtime. They don't care. They want you in the office at all times, and basically would have you live there if you could.

3. You're constantly being put down, never praised
And nothing you do is ever good enough, like everrrrr. Your boss or colleagues only see your faults, mistakes, and less than perfect moments. All that good work you do? Yea, that means nothing. All the positive contributions you made? Again, NOTHING.

4. You have to force a smile and the bad mood is permanent
 If you have to give yourself a self-motivating pep talk every morning just to get yourself out of bed and off to work, then yea...that's a problem. It's even worse when not even that pep talk helps, and you find yourself constantly hating life between the hours of 8am-6pm.

5. They only care about themselves, no interest in how you are doing
If you can't remember the last time your boss asked you, "how are you doing?" then it's a problem. It doesn't matter how high your boss' status is; there is no excuse to not check in with their direct reports on a regular basis. A boss who remembers your name, your accomplishments, and genuinely cares how you're doing in your job and if you're happy with it, is a boss worth keeping. All others, not so much.


No job, boyfriend, friend, family member is perfect. Relationships will never be perfect. But that doesn't mean you have to settle for bad treatment. If any of these warning signs have hit you close to home, it might be time to start visiting monster.com.

Have you ever had a job that was like a bad relationship? I wanna know all about it! Tell me in the comments below!

Have a beautiful day <3


Cheers - Vanessa A.

Micki Song Cosmetics - if you don't know, now you know!

From left to right: Drunk N' Love, Killer Queen, Berry Pretty

Hello beautiful friends!

Today I want to take a moment to share my opinions on some fabulous lipsticks by Micki Song Cosmetics!

First and foremost, let me give a little intro to this amazing up-and-coming cosmetics brand. Micki Song Cosmetics launched earlier this year, first with just a few select colors of opaque, matte lipsticks. In the last few months, she has continued to grow her line and has added many more colors in matte and cream formulas, as well as some gorgeous liquid lipsticks. Seriously, she must be doing something right if she has had such growth in less than a year!

Now, let's get into the review! Spoiler: It's all pros, no cons.

Sunshine she's here, you can take a break...

Tuesday Yogi tea time!

"Love your soul." - Yogi Tea

Hi world!  Hope you're all having a great day/week/month/year! Life is good, even when it's bad. Never forget that.

So, my latest obsession has been with Yogi tea! Not only do I love the tea itself - SO yum - but I just love the fun perk of gaining a bit of motivation or positive pick-me-ups every time I drink it. And since, of course, I love me some motivation and positivi-tea (lol), I decided to share my Yogi "Teaspirations" with my blog world.....

I walk to the sound of my own drum!

“Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it.” ― Confucius

Hello beautiful humans! I know, I suck for not having kept up with my blog very much this month. Sometimes the priorities just pile up and though you may utilize your time efficiently, there still won't always be time for EVERYTHING. Only in a perfect world...

But of course, I have missed my little writing spot and as usual, I assure y'all I have not been uninspired. I am OOZING with inspiration and ideas, but I've made a conscious decision to hold off until after this semester is over and I'll have the time to really dedicate myself to this, because I really want to put in 100% and let my creativity shine the way it deserves....

Believe that life can change, that you're not stuck in vain...

"Dreams are today's answers to tomorrow's questions." - Edgar Cayce

Happy Tuesday, friends! Short post today because I am on my lunch break. However, I am trying to have content up here more often so that means writing whenever I have a chance! This is me being proactive towards a dream I have; making a living from writing.

I hope everyone is having a great week so far. I know I sure am. Amidst all my work, studying and general busyness, I am feeling very at peace these days. I am at peace because for the first time in a long time, I have a vision for my future.

Nights were mainly made for saying things that you can't say tomorrow day...

 

"Use what talents you possess: the woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best." - Henry Van Dyke

It's Fun Fact Friday! Yes, this is new and no I probably won't keep up with it religiously, however I think this is a fun segment to my blog that I hope to incorporate at least somewhat regularly. I'm trying here people! I hardly even have time to keep my manis and pedis lookin' fresh, okay?

So...

FUN FACT: Everyone has a talent.

I'll be here a while, ain't going nowhere...

"There's so little time and never a convenient time for anything, so you have to just do it" - Charles Fraser, Encounters with the Archdruid

Hello friends. Short little post today...

I've been finding it hard to find time to write in here. I work a full time job followed by school all night, all week. My day job is very consuming as is school. I know that doesn't sound like much and there are people out there who do far more in their daily 24 hours than I do, but this is relatively new to me. Sure, I've done the work and school thing many times before, but now I'm at a point where my school is getting a lot more serious hence taking up more of my time that I didn't usually spend on school in the past.

That being said, the quote above is actually from a book I just read for my Earth Resources class. It wasn't exactly my cup of tea and I found it mostly boring, but of course I always have a knack for spotting beautiful quotes in whatever I read. I pride myself in that, really. I think it's a gift to be able to appreciate a combination of words so much that you naturally see a beautiful meaning in those words, even if its use is totally different from how you understand it.

This quote couldn't be more relevant to my life right now. I've been feeling pointlessly stressed out over being so busy that I've winded up making excuses for not doing other things I enjoy, i.e. my blog. I have so many ideas about where I want to go with this blog, yet I find myself thinking "there's no way I have the time to work on it all." But then I saw this quote the other day. It was a reminder that sometimes, life gets busy. You won't always have a perfect time to sit and write. You won't always have ideal time to get exciting projects up and running. So, you gotta learn to just start somewhere and then keep going. It is so important to learn how to make time, not excuses, for doing things. If you want to follow your dreams and have your goals reached, then it's imperative to find the energy to do whatever it takes with whatever time you have. 

So, I leave you all with this: Just do it. No excuses. Life will never be convenient.

xo - VA

Post title credit: 311 - "I'll Be Here a While"

We're singing a new song now and everything starts today...

"Our most basic instinct is not for survival but for family. Most of us would give our own life for the survival of a family member, yet we lead our daily life too often as if we take our family for granted." - Paul Pearshall

Hello world...


When a person is born, the first people they meet, aside from the doctor and nurses, is their family. A permanent bond is created in the mere seconds of a child coming into the world. That's all it takes, seconds, for unconditional love to form. A husband and wife become parents, in-laws become grandparents, only childs become siblings, and nieces and nephews become cousins. Everyone is linked by blood, and will forever share a connection.

So riddle me this. Does blood make you family? Is blood thicker than water? That is something I've pondered upon many times, yet still have not found a clear solution to. But I do think that at the end of the day, family is family, and there is no changing that.

Only in a perfect world would all family members get along beautifully and happily. Reality is, personalities clash and opinions differ. It is inevitable. I completely agree with the quote above, and I am sure I am not alone in the guilty chair here. I know I am not perfect, but I am genuine. I do my best. It's important to accept the fact that there will be differences, and to keep in mind that you don't choose your family. So, you better learn to love them.

What is most sad though, is when a family that was so beyond close, becomes so distant. Once upon a time there was such a tight friendship, but it was torn apart by a difference of opinions. Secrets shared become small talk sparsely shared, and it becomes just family visiting family. It's heartbreaking. It is what it is.

I think everyone should always bear in mind that your family will always be there for you. Appreciate what you have on the day to day more often. Life is short.

This all applies to friendships as well by the way (and since I wrote about love in my previous post I'll keep romantic relationships out of this, but it most certainly applies to those as well). Like the saying goes, your friends are the family you choose. Don't take good friends for granted. I certainly have not been a model friend, but I can own up to it and make things right. Lucky are those who have life long friends. I love my friends so dearly, and it is so gratifying to have friendships that are close to being 20 years old. Real friendship understands that lives change course and go down different paths sometimes. That's why real friendships will always last. Hold on to those.


- VA


Post title song: Guster - "Keep it Together"

We've come too far to give up who we are...

“So yes. It had flaws, but what does that matter when it comes to matters of the heart? We love what we love. Reason does not enter into it. In many ways, unwise love is the truest love. Anyone can love a thing because. That's as easy as putting a penny in your pocket. But to love something despite. To know the flaws and love them too. That is rare and pure and perfect.” ― Patrick Rothfuss, The Wise Man's Fear

Hello.

I'm ashamed that I never wrote a conclusion to my trip to North Carolina. The time has passed now, and all I can tell you is it was nothing short of amazing. It was a beautiful place spent in great company.

Moving along, I finished a book yesterday. It was a part 2 in a series of supposedly three books, maybe more. All I know is book three has yet to be published, and I miss Kvothe (pronounced Quothe). He, of course, is the main character. The book is called The Wise Man's Fear, the series is called King Killer Chronicle. First book is Name of the Wind, and that one is really the best of the two. But you can't not have read the second book, so it's ok. That alone makes it not so bad. It had its good moments, and the quote above is one of them.

This quote is perfect beyond words. Obviously, you don't need to have read the book to appreciate this beautiful combination of words. The words were arranged so eloquently it's almost poetic, but Kvothe is no poet (something he strongly points out several times throughout the books).

I honestly fell in love with this quote the moment I read it. It makes you think about a love you gave up on, doesn't it? It makes you wonder if maybe you didn't try hard enough. Maybe you gave up too easily. If you love someone, aren't you supposed to love them as a whole? You can't have just the pieces that you like of a person, obviously. Us humans are not rotisserie chicken, where you can choose to devour just the parts that you like. People come as a package deal. It is what it is. All or nothing, or so they say.

So, when you can love a person so completely that you love even their worst flaws, is that when you are truly in love? I mean, to love something that much, that entirely, are you enamored or just plain crazy? Why does one have to accept flaws when it comes to love? If someone loves you that much, how can you not reciprocate it? Does the mere fact of being that loved make it enough to love that love back? No, I don't think it's quite as automatic as that. However, I do believe it can be a catalyst to set you off into the path of that kind of love. I also believe that a love that grand deserves to be returned.

"We love what we love"

No truer words have ever been written. When it comes right down to it, you can't control what your heart feels. You can only control how you react to it. Assuming that a love is just too wrong to ever work out is a manner of selling that love short. Love is never wrong. Don't try to figure love out. Just love. If love is true and honest, then differences should work themselves out. Figure out the area where there are differences and work through them. Personal differences can be like a road block to love. Sometimes there is a detour, and if there is then maybe you should try taking it. It can lead you to a nice clearing perhaps. At the end of the day, love is love.You either want it or you don't. You either make it work or you don't. The detour will never be a short route, you may not even get there over night, but if you just keep driving, then you may wind up somewhere beautiful.

I think that a love as entire as the love described in the quote, is truly a beautiful and rare thing. I think many people live their lives without that kind of love. I also think many people live their lives without knowing they had that kind of love.

Anyway, my dear readers in bloglandia, I leave the rest of the sparkle of this quote to you. May it touch your heart the way it touched mine. Also, may it perhaps inspire you to pick up these books to read. Kvothe is definitely a character worth knowing.

Feel free to leave your insights on this topic in the comments below!


xoxo- VA


Post title credit: Daft Punk & Pharrell - Get Lucky

'Cause there's too many places I've got to see...

“One’s destination is never a place, but a new way of seeing things.” – Henry Miller

Hello world. So I'm almost half way to North Carolina. We're making pretty good timing I think. Definitely making better time than the predicted 12 hours and 45 minutes. Danielle took the first driving shift, now Christina is up and around 1am I'll be taking the wheel for the final stretch. This trip has already been so wonderful so far. 

There's nothing like good music and good conversations to make a road trip enjoyable. Honestly, as the quote explains, Im mostly enjoying the road and bonding with my girl friends. Sure, I've never been to North Carolina so I'm excited for that, but in the end it's the time I'm spending with these lovely ladies that I'll cherish most. It's the journey, not the destination, that stays with you forever. The destination I seek here is a place of marvelous sights and sceneries, and a place of happy memories and good times.

Having grown up in Miami and never having really seen the mountain scenery that my beautiful USA has to offer, I feel this trip will give me a new perspective on life. Nature has a way of awakening parts of your soul that are dormant when you are only surrounded by familiar lands your entire life.

Well I'm going back to copiloting. I'll be back when I reach NC.

- VA

Post title credit: Lynyrd Skynyrd - "Free Bird" 

Stripped to the waist, we fall into the river...

“Learn what is to be taken seriously and laugh at the rest.” - Hermann Hesse


Hello bloglandia. Quickie post today. I have gone missing for a little while, but I assure you all I have not been uninspired. Time is just a funny little thing that likes to consume one's life, and lately I have not had much of it.

I am embarking on a road trip adventure with two of my dearest friends tomorrow. We are going from Miami (my lovely city) to Burnsville, NC. This will be my first long road trip, and my first time in North Carolina, and in a mountain scenery in general. To say I am excited is an understatement. I am looking so forward to this trip. It will be a much needed escape from reality, and I know I will be in the best of company.

So, to continue with my theme of analyzing quotes, I will say that I chose the above quote for this post because that is how I feel about my upcoming trip. I feel carefree and easy going. I feel this little trip is going to be very cathartic for my soul. In life, you must realize that, although yes some things are important and should be taken seriously, you mustn't forget to stop and laugh often. Life is beautiful and laughter is a way of expressing happiness.

Love much, laugh often, worry not at all. ♥


- VA


Post title credit: Ellie Goulding - "Anything Could Happen"

I crashed my car into the bridge. I don't care, I love it!

"Running is the greatest metaphor for life, because you get out of it what you put into it." -Oprah Winfrey

Good day, world. I do believe it's about time I lighten up my tone around here. I've been far too morose and serious as of late. Life goes on and happiness is easy, as aforementioned in previous posts. So, it's time I get with it and proceed with a more positive tone and atmosphere up in this little blog world of mine.

Last weekend, I ran the Key Biscayne bridge, a 4 mile run, for my first time ever. Amazing would be an understatement! I have never felt so accomplished in my life, it has always been a goal of mine to run that bridge. To be honest, the pessimist in me never quite believed I could do it. I always thought "Well, I'll need a lot more training before I get there" or "I'm just not ready for it so I'll wait". Well, I haven't ran in over a month, and on Saturday afternoon with my best friend Danielle, we decided to hit the bridge. The original intention was to walk it. However, without a second thought, the urge to run just swept me away, and before I knew it, I had reached the top. I did a happy dance and everything. I felt like Rocky when he made it up the stairs during his training.

I love running - it's free and good for your health, and the runner's high is quite lovely. Running has always been my go-to cardio source. There is no better feeling than hitting the concrete with some good music in your ears, and just going. As the quote from the wonderful Oprah Winfrey above states, running really is a huge metaphor for life. When it comes to running, you must always run forward and push your limits. You can't make a mile if you stand still, so you move forward. Eventually, you pass that mile and you find you can keep going for that second mile, and so on and so on. No, running is not easy. AT ALL. However, if you keep at it and never give up, it does get easier. Sound familiar? Yes. That is how life works! Just like running. In fact, I compared inner growth to just this concept of strengthening a few weeks ago. Click here to read that post.

So anyway, I must admit I had quite an amazing Saturday. I fell in love with Running all over again. I am so inspired to get back to training and maybe run that half-marathon I intended to run last year. I'm not sure of much these days, but I am sure that running will get me through whatever comes my way. There's no better feeling than that of doing something you enjoy, and doing it well.

- VA

Post title credit: Icona Pop - I Love It (feat. Charli XCX) <<- FUNNY STORY by the way about seeing Charli XCX perform at Grand Central Saturday night, then hanging out with her British posse afterwards hahaha, this song will never be the same. Good times! ♥♫

It's a hard life to live so live it well, I'll be your friend and notin pretend...

“Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.” ― Dr. Seuss


Break-ups are hard, there is no denying that. Whether you were the break-upper or the break-upee, whether it was your choice or the result of wrong doing by either party, it's still a hard thing to go through. There's no such thing as a good or bad break up. The reality is, they always suck.

Memories are a funny thing. They're completely permanent, they'll never cease to exist. They'll go into hiding, sure, but they will always exist in some dark corner of your mind. Then they have a way of surfacing in your mind when you least want them to. It's like your brain purposely trying to fuck with you. Like "Oh hey, you thought you were ok? Here, remember this?", and then I'm all like "ugh, thanks for nothing, stupid brain."

I find myself feeling very heavy-hearted and a bit nostalgic these last few days, as if I am having a very delayed reaction to my break-up. Worse than that, I find myself getting teary-eyed at the most inopportune times, such as while I'm at work, or driving home in the rain. I can't control it, it's random spurts of sadness that just come over me out of no where. I suppose it is expected when you were with someone for so long. All my memories of my last year and a half include him, so the nostalgia and tears must certainly be inevitable.

Break-ups are weird. Super WEIRD! I can't seem to find a more fitting word for how I have been feeling. They say opposites attract, but I have found that they might only hold their attraction for a certain amount of time.

I'm sad that it's over, but I am also happy it happened. Life goes on. Time to see what the Universe has in store for me next. Life is short and nothing lasts forever. All I can do is put on my big girl panties and carry on.

- VA

Post title credit: The Kooks - "Ooh La"

Whenever I'm alone with you, you make me feel like I am free again...

"It occurred to him dimly that you could only express your ownership of a thing in terms of how freely you could give it up" - Stephen King, The Talisman


Hello world. So this quote has been sitting in my drafts since two weekends ago, and I'd like to discuss it for a moment. I came across this line in the book by Stephen King, The Talisman, which I finished just before starting this draft. When I read a book, I really like to take in every single word. I love seeing great quotes disguised as a story. Perhaps I over analyze sometimes, but I love it. I love seeing greater meanings behind words. What good is literature if it doesn't spark a flow of thoughts in your mind? Writing is a beautiful thing. It's art. So just as with a painting that you interpret, you also should interpret the meaning of words as well.


The Talisman was a wonderful book. Certainly a great adventure. I loved traveling with Jack Sawyer, and I miss that kid right now. Having a mini book review moment, I'd like to say that it was a pleasure to have shared this journey with Jack. I saw him grow from a scared child into a fearless man of 13 years old. It was a beautiful thing, and Jack was a beautiful character. When reading Stephen King novels, one must be aware that the story takes a little while to develop. Mostly always. However, it is always worth the extra details, the endless chapters, because that is what builds your relationship with the characters. I have a special place in my heart for every character I have met in my Stephen King readings.


Anyway, about this quote, I found it to be so true. It can relate to many aspects in life. I'll let you readers do the connecting. Read the quote and really think about it, beyond what it says. Think about how it relates to your life, and reflect upon the fact that true ownership and being possessive are two very different things. True ownership is above possession.


Enjoy.


- VA


Post title credit: 311 - "Love Song"

The road is long, we carry on; try to have fun in the meantime...

"A ship in port is safe, but that's not what ships are built for." - Grace Murray Hopper


Short quote, but with so much depth, in my opinion. Get out of your safety zone!

First off, I have an insane amount of insight I want to share. So much has happened to me this week and I'm overflowing with thoughts and reflections. However, it's important to me in this case to really sit down and put it all into words. My mind is a fog with words in it's atmosphere and I so want to do those words justice by expressing them to their full extent. I've reached an immense turning point in my life right now, and I want my writing to capture the greatness of it.

That being said, the quote above sparked my interest. I feel I have spent the last year of my life safely docked at the port. Naturally, fear is the reason for staying in a safety zone. People have become either so fearful, or maybe just so lazy, that they forget the fact that us humans are built to LIVE. You can't fully live if you don't MOVE. Life will not happen to you if you hide from it, and what fun is that? As a kid, I always preferred to be the seeker rather than the hider. So, you can imagine my surprise when I suddenly woke up and realized I've been hiding from the world for quite some time.

Last weekend, I saw many things more clearly. I noticed I've had a dormant longing to revel in the beauties of the world. I've lost sight of the simple loveliness that is all around us in nature. I want to absorb the world back into my soul, for I was being slowly squeezed like a sponge up until now. Well, it was during this time, out on the ocean, where I came alive. It was like an invisible force guiding me steadily through the waves as the boat was going full speed ahead, taking me in tune with the rhythm of the waves. I suddenly saw the water in a different way - it's crystal clear shade of blue green, with the waves crashing and leaving powdered sugar sprinkled about. It was beautiful, and though I've been at sea many times, I never saw what I saw at that moment before. I left the port, exited from the safety zone, and saw the world with new eyes. I will never be the same again. I've always been uptight about getting in the water and wetting my hair. This time, I jumped in, left my worries on the boat, and I wet my hair.

So, my dear readers, take my advice and leave the port. It's scary and very difficult to do, but you surely will never regret it. Don't deprive your soul from seeing the world and being free just because you're too scared of what's out there. I'm no longer scared, in fact quite the contrary. I have never been more excited in my life! I feel so good. So happy. So alive. It's easy to forget how amazing life can be when you're stuck in the darkness of a safe zone. It's like a disease that slowly eats up every bit of hope and happiness and all the potential inside of you. Good news is, there's a cure for that. It's called WAKE THE FUCK UP AND LIVE! I hope everyone can one day feel the epiphany I have felt recently. I'm so grateful to be where I am right at this very moment. What's to come for me in the future, I have no cares for. I'm living for today, no looking back, no looking too far ahead. I think we all can agree when I say the present is a gift and you should enjoy it without fear.

The past will always be a part of you, there is no denying that, but what good is growing older if you don't grow wiser as well? It does no good. Live, learn, and be happy. I've already mentioned it a few times, but I will reiterate - being happy is simple and so important.


- VA

Post title song: Lana Del Rey - Born To Die ♥♥♥

But I dont care what they say, there's no mess that can't be danced away...

“Don’t worry about what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive and do that, because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” - Howard Thurman

"If you want to be happy, set a goal that commands your thoughts, liberates your energy and inspires your hopes." - Andrew Carnegie


Double quoting it today. Both inspired me this morning. In life, you must dare to do something that awakens your soul, and happiness will follow. It's really quite simple to be happy. I've recently come to realize that sometimes, it's okay to be a little selfish. You can not spend your life trying to please others. You wind up losing sight of the pleasures that YOU need. Of course, it's important to do good things for other people and to be caring, loving and selfless. However, that all goes to a certain extent. It's crucial to have a line drawn, to mark the end of pleasing others and the beginning of pleasing yourself. In fact, you are more apt to be a more pleasant and helpful person to others if your own pleasures and needs are being met in turn.

As the first quote states, the world needs people who have come alive. That is so true. So many people in society today have become so caught up in the materialistic aspects of their lives that they have completely forgotten their passions. In my opinion, passion is what makes a person come alive. Without passion, you certainly will not be as happy as can be. I've learned this from first hand experience, especially lately. My passions, once forgotten, are slowly reemerging to the surface of my heart and soul. For a long time now, I thought I've been happy. What I really was, was complacent. I was living every day as it came, but with no real oomph to it. I was basically living just to live.

We only have one life, and it is damn short. Recent events in my life have made me see that, and I'd be a fool not to cease the opportunity to make some changes, and now. Reflecting on the second quote above, happiness requires your own actions. You also need to set those actions in motion towards goals that are important to you. Focus your energy on things that will ignite a fire in your heart, don't waste time on anything that you don't have a passion for. It's just pointless, and you will reap no rewards in the end.

Reading, writing, music, dancing...these are a few of my passions. They were lost but now are found. I feel like I have just woken up from a very long slumber, and I am refreshed and ready to take on the world! We often lose our selves in the day-to-day, and sometimes it's hard to snap out of it. I have all the goods I need, what I am truly craving right now is complete, utter electrifying passion

Trust in the Universe, let go of the things that weigh you down, and most of all - find your passion!

- VA


Post title credit: Maya Jane Coles Feat. Karin Park - "Everything"   ;)

Oh that body, oh that face, makes me wanna party..

"Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strength. When you go through hardship and decide not to surrender, that is strength." - Arnold Schwarzenegger

If there is anything I have learned in this life of mine, it is that the saying "what doesn't kill you will only make you stronger" is one of the most truest sayings I know. When times seem so tough that you can hardly bare it any longer, yet you keep on truckin' anyway, that is your inner strength at work. Inner strength is exactly like physical strength, in the sense that you need to exercise it in order for it to grow.

There are many life situations that will exercise your inner strength. A really tough break up, for instance, will eventually make you that much more stronger. I remember so clearly, many moons ago after breaking up with my first "love", I thought my world would never be the same again. However, after a while I began to literally FEEL my heart and soul growing stronger daily. It was the craziest feeling, one I can not even put into words, but I surely felt it. It was real. It wasn't just a mental issue of getting over him that made me feel stronger, because honestly the inner strength came way before I was "over him". In fact, it was my inner strength that led to my moving on. I wish I could explain that feeling of growth and strength, but I can tell you all this: it was one of the most empowering stages of my life. I was never the same again, for the better.

Then, there are other life obstacles that will always test that inner strength of yours. In 2011, I faced one of the most challenging years in my life. I had some life troubles, and of course through out the course of resolving it and doing what I had to do, I came to realize that nobody will help you but you. There were times when I just wanted to give up, throw in the white flag and be done with it. I wanted to crawl into a dark little cave and never come out. I cried so many tears, but those tears were just weakness leaving my body. I never did give up. I kept taking on every single new challenge that would arise, and I survived each one. I never gave up, and I am a far better person for it today. I have learned a hard lesson, a lesson I hope to never learn again.

One thing I haven't mentioned, the real key to growing your inner strength, is to surround yourself with people who care about you. I could not have gotten through that break up or that life issue without the endless support of my family and friends. They were there for me every single step of the way. It's the same concept as muscle strengthening, really, because you wouldn't do bench presses with out a spotter now, would you? Friends and family are your life spotters. You don't need to have many of them, in fact you're better off with a small trusting circle of loving people than you are with a huge circle of people who can give three shits about what you're going through.

Now, here I am facing yet another life obstacle. I'm taking this one on with less fear, because I thankfully have developed my inner strength from my past experiences, and kept it going. I'm going through this now with many past wounds that I've overcome influencing my next move and the move after that. Like a collection of different experiences that keep adding on to each other and growing from each other. Inner strengthening is an ongoing process. There is no limit, just as there is no limit to how many weights you lift in your lifetime. In order to maintain, you must push on and keep exercising every single day. Keep on truckin'! As the quote above states, it's in the not giving up where your inner strength truly lies.

Stay strong my friends. Never EVER give up!

- VA



Post title credit: Lana Del Rey - Young & Beautiful ♥ (favorite song right now)

It's a roller coaster ride, of emotion

“Life is a process of becoming. A combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a kind of death.” ~Anais Nin

Life is like a roller coaster. It takes you in so many different directions, has some really scary moments, but it's always ok in the end. You get off the ride, and realize you want to go for another ride.

If you want to be happy in life, you must learn to appreciate the constant change, for as the saying goes, the only constant in life is change. It's just inevitable. By choosing to hold on to a certain feeling, time period or person, you're robbing yourself of so many possibilities. By clinging to one thing, you wind up up missing out on the beauty of life. The beauty of life is that we can feel so many things, and a lot of times as life moves forward, you learn to feel new amazing things that you've never felt before. Growth is not only physical nor is it only mental. Growth takes place in the heart and soul as well. By standing still, not trying new things, you're putting that growth to a halt. 

It saddens me to see people not enjoying the natural flow of life. Like the above quote states, life is a process of becoming. You need to go through all sorts of different experiences to fully enjoy the many different mental states a person can be in. For instance, being in a state of such passion that you lose all control. Or being in a state of happiness, but the kind of happiness that comes from being successful. There's so many different states of happiness you can be in, but you'll never know if you don't dare to live. I mean really, really live. The only thing that can hold you back from living is yourself, and by yourself I mean myself too. I know there's a lot more out there waiting for me, I just need to stick to the process. Go with the flow.

-VA

Post title credit - The Whitest Boy Alive - "Roller Coaster Ride"